I've tried a lot of crazy things in my life, I think. I've eaten things that most people wouldn't dare and tried things that the average person might be scared to do. I've tasted turtle, horse, dog, pig tongue, duck brain, etc; I love to rock climb, rappel, river raft, and gosh-darnit if I go to an amusement park I ride every roller coaster! Ok, so I'm not saying that I'm a daredevil - anybody who knows me could tell you that any risk I take has been meticulously calculated - however I do believe that I do have an above-average control of my fears.
I almost met my match last Wednesday when I faced my fear of the Chinese massage.
I know what some of you are thinking. "Massage!? I sure could use a massage! Why in the world would you be afraid of a massage?" Just wait. You'll be scared, too. This is no ordinary massage. No, sirree. This massage dates back almost 2,000 years and is rumored to be able to cure anything from a sore shoulder to the common cold. This particular type of massage therapy is well-know to most people all over China and can be found in decent massage parlors from Beijing to Karamay.
And it sucks. Literally.
I'll give you a general idea of the process of this therapy, even though its much easier to understand when watching the video below. 
After properly preparing the back by massaging oil on it for 5 minutes or so, a series of round, glass balls - or "cups" as I will now refer to them - are placed on the back. A moment before placement a small fire is lit inside the cup and soon removed to heat up the air inside. Once the cup makes contact with the skin on your back the hot air creates a vacuum that sucks your skin far into the glass globe. This method, known formally as "flash-fire cupping", feels about as good as it sounds to be honest, but better yet it does a smash-up job of leaving a hickey on your back the size of a small pancake. Once the cups are secure you must allow them to suck at your skin for 10 minutes. As you can tell in the photo below, I got 18 of them (there's one on my right shoulder barely visible if you're counting).
So here's the short story of how and why - questions that I would be asking if I were you right now. The man you see standing next to me in the picture above, Cons, is a friend who has been having some back difficulties. When we talked with a Chinese friend about it, he recommended this therapy which is supposed to (as I mentioned before) ease back pain and cure the common cold. He had back pain, and even though I didn't have a cold to put that crazy notion to the test, I couldn't pass up the opportunity. All three of us agreed to meet on Wednesday and subject ourselves to this "therapy".
I can now tell you that true male bonding only happens when you're half-naked having your back sucked into what feels like a hundred tiny glass balls. You don't get much closer than that.
I was the last person to get the cups, and as I sat there watching the grimaces on the faces of my "cupping" buddies, I can't lie and tell you that I didn't almost back out. You pay for pain with this therapy on the promise that it will make your life better in the days to come - and I don't normally pay for pain! It's too early to tell you how effective this method is physically, but it is already effective in giving my new "conquered fears" list some pizazz:
Fears I have conquered:
1) Eating pig brains
2) Rappelling a high rock face
3) Receiving 18 hickeys by fire-breathing suction cups
Who's a daredevil now?
Friday, June 06, 2008
Chinese Massage Therapy Sucks - My Experience with Suction Therapy
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6 Comments:
yikes!!! that looks creepy. I think that would be a fear of mine, probably I'd be more afraid of the hickey thing not going away and having measle type spots on my back the rest of my life. It just does not seem right to do such a thing. just weeeird. I'm impressed you subjected yourself to such a therapy though. I applaud you. so when's tiff gonna get in on this one?? ;) she should endure some of that too, don't ya think? haha. well, let us know just how helpful it was, if it is...doesn't seem like it could possibly do anything beneficial, but if it does, I'm very curious what it is that's so good. I can't imagine...anyways, thanks for talking a bit tonight/your afternoon. talk to ya lata!
I've had this quite a few times--my wife forces me to do it. Fortunately, I don't have to pay. It's usually followed with a severe beating...I mean, rough massage.
That red thing won't leave on your back for the rest of your lift. It is would gone in about a week. There is no pain when having the therapy, and to be honest, if you have the common cold of your back, do this would make you feel much better.
Yeah, I experienced the same thing in XJ. Looked like someone drove down my back. They moved the jars around on my back and it just sucked back. I am not so sure that I got any benefit from it at all...
This is not a massage therapy. You cup somebody when he has cold. This is a technique which is also used in Central Europe, though maybe now kind of forgotten but very efficient and good. But nurses here shoud remember how to do this. It's better than taking hectic medicines. Cheers.
@Adam - Regardless of whether cupping is technically a "massage", it still takes place at a massage parlor therefore I have no problem referring to it as such.
I also disagree about your comment of it being "efficient and good". I'm sure there are positive aspects to it, but the Chinese claim that it cures the common cold is a bit bold and not at all scientifically proven. Still, it was an interesting experience and I have many friends here who do this on a regular basis...more power to them!
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